I value manners. I work in a public place that is frequented by children. Often, these children ask me for things. Sometimes they ask with a please and a thank you, and at these times I am very impressed, especially if they do it unprompted. If they do it when prompted, I am especially impressed with their parents.
One of my dearest wishes is to have a child who asks with a please and a thank you. I know that it might seem small and petty, but knowing how to ask is such an important social skill. When you ask with a “Can I please have this?” instead of with a “Give me that!” wonderful things happen.
We’ve been working on manners since my daughter could talk, and we’re at the point where she will often say please and thank you of her own accord. Each time we encounter a social situation that requires a please and a thank you, I remind her going in and I remind her if she forgets.
Our current focus is on “Excuse me.” When a parent is having a discussion with another adult, you say, “Excuse me,” rather than “Mom? Mom? Mom? Mom? Mom? Mom?”
This is taking some thought. To work with my daughter on this particular aspect of manners, I need to be willing to be interrupted.
When my daughter was smaller, I got her to squeeze my hand if she needed something while I was talking or on the phone. This worked poorly, but it did sometimes work. Now I am trying to teach her to ask with an “Excuse me,” there’s a bit of a catch-22. When she says, “Mom! Mom! Mom!” I need to pay attention to correct her, allowing her to interrupt me. Either that, or I need to remind her to ask with an “Excuse me” every time I enter into conversation with another adult, and that’s a bit difficult. Methinks that a bit of role play might be in order.
Have you taught your preschooler to interrupt nicely or to wait patiently? How did you do it?