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My Son’s Eyes

My eyes are blue and so are my husbands. Our birthmother’s eyes are also blue. I think it was one of the reasons she choose us to adopt, Connor. I think she also choose us because I have dark brown hair and my husband is blond. Our birthmother was blond, but the birthfather had dark brown hair. I always figured that she also considered that whether Connor had blond hair or dark brown hair it would be like one of his adoptive parents. I think we all just assumed he would have blue eyes.

When Connor was born he had dark brown hair that did eventually turn blond. So he had my hair color for awhile, but now he is blond like his Daddy and his birthmother. He also had very dark blue eyes when he born. So dark they almost looked brown. When we were in the hospital Connor’s birthmother made the comment that his eyes were brown and that she was hoping that they would be blue. I looked at his eyes. Weren’t all babies supposed to have blue eyes? They were blue, but again so very dark. I reassured her that they were blue. It was then that I realized that we were all hoping that his eyes would be blue. The three of us all had blue eyes. I even looked at photos of his birthmother when she was a baby and she had very dark blue eyes as well. I told her this too.

As Connor turned a couple months older and his brown hair turned blond, his blue eyes started to gradually change as well. First it was just the center of his eyes around the pupil that started to change to a light brown and his eyes looked more gray than blue. This resembled my blue – gray eyes more so than my husband’s powder blue eyes. I would say to people “I think his eyes will be more like my color eyes. He’ll have blond hair like Jeff’s.” But then when he started to reach his first birthday they were getting browner each day.

Today, he has got the most gorgeous brown eyes. He is blond and fair, and when you look at him it’s those brown eyes that just pull you in and stand out. He got those brown eyes from his birthfather and it’s those eyes that are going to be one of his greatest features. When he smiles his eyes just light up. I was sad for awhile that he didn’t get his birthmother’s eyes and therefore had eyes that looked like his parents. But when I look at him and he looks at me with those brown eyes I just melt. I will have to explain to him someday that although his eyes don’t look like his Mommy and Daddy he is blessed his birthfather gave him such beautiful brown eyes. I embrace this difference.

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About Kathy Sheldon

My name is Kathy Sheldon and I live in Northern NJ with my husband, Jeff, my 15 month old son, Connor, two cats, a bird, and the newest addition our 10 week old Bernese Mountain puppy. I graduated from Buffalo State College and then went on to earn a Masters Degree in Counseling Psychology from Pace University. Prior to my son being born I worked for 7 years in a Domestic Violence Shelter in New York City with women and their children. I counseled women and their families individually and in groups. For the last five years at the shelter I was in administration and management. I resigned from my position as Director of Client Services after Connor was born because my commute into New York City was too long from where we live. When my son Connor was 4 months old I decided to start my Direct Sales Business with the Traveling Vineyard. I chose In Home Wine Tastings because I really enjoy wine and wanted to learn more about it. It was then that I started to write my first blog, "Traveling Wine Adventures." Since my son was adopted and my husband, and I had such a wonderful experience with our adoption and American Adoptions, I inquired with them about doing Adoption Home Studies and was hired contractually in September. I also have started to do Adoption Seminars locally for prospective adoptive parents. In August of 2005 I started my second blog "Working Moms Wanted". I started it because I found myself in place like many new Moms, needing to find work but not knowing if it would be better to work out of my home or get an outside job. My husband and I are socially active people and enjoy spending a lot of our time with families in the neighborhood and our own families. In addition we enjoy many hobbies. I enjoy running, reading, writing, cooking, and of course spending time with Connor.