In an ideal world this asset titled: Neighbors take responsibility for monitoring and supervising children outside the home, would happen everywhere. In the reality of the world we live in it is sometimes our neighbors that we need to protect our children from. Single parents may find this asset difficult to enact because typically the parent works 8+ hours a day out of the home and has a host of responsibilities to take care of once he or she arrives home after work. Still children need this asset to grow up healthy, so try to find some creative ways to communicate with neighbors.
It is important to determine what a boundary is. According to dictionary.com, a boundary is “something that indicates bounds or limits.” In other words this is a set of rules or behavioral norms that are widely accepted. As discussed previously children need to feel known and cared for in order for boundaries to be effective. Some sort of relationship must exist before the enforcement of boundaries can occur.
It is important to get to know your neighbors no matter where you live so that you can have open honest communication with them. When you gain a level of trust with your neighbor let him or her know what type of behavior you find acceptable. For example you can let your neighbor who has children similar to your children’s ages know that you find swearing unacceptable. Then, if you then hear one of their children swearing you can simply say, “We don’t use that language in this neighborhood.” Then if your child swears within earshot of your neighbor he or she can also gently correct your child.
Some ways to help build relationships and healthy boundaries with your neighbors include:
• Regular get togethers with neighbors that give an opportunity for both adults and children to get to know each other.
• Welcome new neighbors with a baked good or other item that you and your children can bring while you introduce yourselves.
• Talk with children about appropriate neighborhood boundaries.
• Determine if you want your home to be the neighborhood-gathering place. Warning-your house will not always be tidy and it will be noisy, but you can offer a safe place to play while getting to know the neighborhood kids personally.
• Try not to speak negatively about problem neighbors in front of the children.
• Ensure that your children respect your neighbors and their property. If your children decide to play kick the can with your neighbor’s garbage can and it breaks, make sure your children either tries to fix it or pay to replace it.
• Watch out for your elderly or disabled neighbors. Help them carry their groceries or other activities when you can.
For more ideas on how to help create a great neighborhood go to the National Civic League, whose goal it is to strengthen communities or read my previous article titled A Caring Neighborhood.