These are just some fun quips and quotes about homes and families. Aren’t the funniest statements always the ones that ring true?
What Does Home Mean to You?
A home should be clean enough to be healthy but messy enough to be happy.
An immaculate home is the sign of a dull woman (or a great cleaning lady!).
Home is where your heart is, even if it’s not always where your head is.
There’s no place like home, except Grandma’s house!
Things You’d Like to Say to the Repairman
How much? Oh, you must have kids in college. Too bad mine can’t go now.
If I knew what was wrong with it, I wouldn’t have called you!
You’ll be here between 8:00 a.m. and 1:00 p.m.? Well, I won’t be. Try me around 2:30.
Did you bring extra mud with you to drag into my house, or is all that really from my yard?
Things Kids Say
Don’t say you can fix anything but a broken heart, Daddy, because nobody can fix everything… except Mommy.
I’m glad you bought fake plants, Mommy. Now you can’t kill them.
Advice on Pets from Kids
Never feed your dog chili when he’s going to sleep in your room that night.
If you try to blow your cat’s nose, you’ll make her real mad.
People can’t drink out of the toilet, only dogs.
Little Kids Answering the Phone
Daddy can’t talk right now, he’s going potty.
Who is this? Who? Who? Who?
Are you a stranger? I’m not supposed to talk to strangers! *click*
Just a minute; I’ll go get him (as the child lays the phone down and goes back to watching TV).
My sister said to tell you that she’s not here.
Who? Mommy’s boss? Are you really overpaid? What does overpaid mean?