These days I spend a large portion of my day (and night) nursing my daughter. Sometimes I find myself getting a little frustrated when I have to stop to nurse her when I am in the middle of doing something else like cleaning, cooking, or writing etc. Again at night when I am particularly tired and she cannot seem to latch on without focused illuminated help. Even though I find myself feeling temporarily frustrated, I also feel a sense of appreciation for the “forced breaks” that I get to take throughout the day and I am grateful for the time that I get to spend in the moment loving my baby girl.
The time my daughter and I spend together bonding over breast milk are times to be treasured. It is during her eating sessions that we get to know each other. It is her chance to tell me what she needs, likes, and feels about her new life outside the womb. It is during these moments that I fall more and more in love with this precious little person that my husband and I loved into being. Her mannerisms are notably more apparent to me during our colloquy of intense telepathy. She is a very calm and mild manner baby. As I embrace her in my motherly and unconditional love, she also expresses a sense of love and gratitude. When she is quite hungry, she anxiously and excitedly tries to get a good latch, her little hands frantic, her tiny head bobbing, and her baby voice uttering telling but unintelligible sounds. I have to pull her hands out of the way and position her head properly while holding my areola between my index and middle fingers to try to make it easier for her to latch. Once she gets a good latch, she sometimes grasps my finger in her tiny hand and makes the cutest sounds of contentment, gratitude, and (what I like to interpret as) happiness. It is during these nursing moments that I truly appreciate the gift of mothering an infant.