My son is officially one month old today. There have been thousands of photographs, hundreds of nursing sessions, about 30 days without sleeping the whole night through, and one large family visit. This month also included the return to being a full-time student, part-time teacher, and infrequent graphic designer for Dad.
I’ve been noticing a trend about my approaches to fatherhood. Remember that whole idea about becoming like your parents as you age? I’ve kind of figured out why. My primary example of fatherhood is my own father. Similarly, parenthood has primarily been modeled for me by my parents. In my case this is a positive. My parents are great people. They are also great parents. They’ll also be wonderful grandparents (they already are). This lifelong example has led me to pick up some tendencies when relating to my son.
Since there isn’t really a textbook about being a parent the examples you see become the guidebook you follow. My younger brother has also been a good example for me. His son (born just 10 months before my son) is a happy boy who really loves his parents. These examples have shaped me as a father and pointed me in the right direction.
Everyone, however, has a unique situation they will need to adapt their particular parenting styles to in order to be successful. My non-nine-to-five work hours (which often extend into the evenings too) and recent parenthood limit the complete usefulness of the solid examples found in my father and brother.
Since I’m a “creative type” I’ve found the internet a valuable resource for additional parenting tips. Most of the tips that are helpful to me are about finding the time to be creative and also more productive in order to create free time I didn’t know I had. I’ll close with a question to both Mom’s and Dad’s: what did you learn about parenting on your own that could be useful to someone else with your somewhat unique circumstance?