By now everyone has heard about Alec Baldwin’s tirade to his 11-year-old daughter, Ireland. We know that that he left an angry voicemail message verbally abusing her by calling her a “thoughtless, little pig” and more. All because she wasn’t available at the time of a scheduled call on April 11. You may have also heard that he partly blames parental alienation by his ex Kim Basinger for his behavior.
There’s never an excuse for verbally abusing a child. What parents have to remember though is that sometimes our non-verbal gestures are just as damaging to a young child’s psyche. We show our kids how we are feeling by our body language and tone of voice. And sometimes the message is written all over our face. Even when we are not aware that we are sending the wrong messages, our kids can pick up that we are displeased with them. We want to keep the lines of communication open. So if we are displeased we need to address the issue in a calm, non-threatening manner. Once the issue has been solved, we need to move on.
I realize that sometimes it’s difficult not to show our feelings. If possible, remove yourself from your child’s presence until you get it together. Lock yourself in the bathroom if necessary.
Kids not only read the non-verbal clues that we send them but they can read between the lines. So in all our interactions with our kids we should be careful how we present ourselves by our words and our deeds. I feel for this child. Those words not only stung her at the time her father uttered them but to have those words blasted across the Internet and discussed on TV was like opening a wound that had started to heal. So parents be careful what you say as well as what you don’t say; your kids are listening and watching you.
See also:
Creating A Positive Home Environment