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“Please Don’t Ask Me for Relationship Advice”

I have a strange reality in my world that I have not quite figured out yet. For some bazaar reason, several of my partnered and married friends want to talk to me about their partnership problems. These partnered parents seem to think that I am the one—me, the long-time single parent with a divorce record—to share advice and ideas about how to make the two-parent home life happy…why? I continue to tell them that I am the LAST person to ask for relationship advice and they probably don’t want to hear what I would have to say anyway—but it keeps happening…

I am not really an expert on much in this world—okay, maybe making pie crust, but that took a year of experimentation and practice to get good at making pie crust. As for parenting, partnerships, work, frugality, growing tulips, or whatever—I am definitely NOT an expert–especially when it comes to choosing comparable partners or making a marriage last or sharing parenting and romance in a long term relationship. Yet, I have those friends who turn to me with their troubles and trials and want my feedback. What sort of insight can I possibly offer? You would think they would take one look at this single forty-year old parent of three and figure I am the last person on earth to talk marriage and partnerships! No qualifications, that what I would say.

Now if you want to chat about communicating with an ex or getting by on one income or how to juggle all the responsibilities and realities that come with being a single parent, or commiserate about what it is like to have your family judged and evaluated based on the fact that you are only one parent, or to be shunned by old “couple friends” because you are no longer a couple—then I’m your gal; I may not be an expert but I would be up for an animated chat. Just don’t ask me for relationship advice—my track record should speak for itself!

Please see the Marriage Blog instead…