Now here’s a wrestling match I have a feeling many Americans would pay to view: Barack Obama vs. Hillary Rodham Clinton vs. John McCain.
Unfortunately, the closest most of us will likely get to seeing a presidential smackdown is a rerun of last night’s war of words between the candidates on World Wrestling Entertainment’s live “Monday Night Raw.”
The ultra-hyped “smackdown” turned out to be more of a stumping with each candidate delivering a wrestling-themed verbal attack.
The taped messages appeared on USA network’s most popular primetime show in advance of tonight’s Pennsylvania primary.
“Tonight, in honor of the WWE, you can call me Hillrod,” Clinton said in her message. “This election is starting to feel a lot like ‘King of the Ring.’ The only difference? The last man standing may just be a woman.”
Meanwhile, Obama tried to channel “The Rock” (surprise, surprise) by using the wrestler’s famous catchphrase during his verbal assault on his foes.
“To the special interests who’ve been setting the agenda in Washington for too long and to all the forces of division and distraction that has stopped us from making progress, for the American people, I’ve got one question: Do you smell what Barack is cooking?”
As for McCain, he looked to Hulk Hogan for inspiration:
“Looks like Hillary Clinton and Barack Obama want to celebrate their differences in the ring,” McCain said in his appearance. “Well, that’s fine with me, but let me tell you: If you want to be the man, you have to beat the man. Come November, it’ll be game over. And whatcha gonna do when John McCain and all his McCainiacs run wild on you?”
If you missed the candidate’s corny… I mean clever… attempts to woo voters (the taped messages will air repeatedly over the next several months to promote “Smackdown Your Vote!” – the WWE’s voter registration drive) and elicit a laugh or two you should consider tuning into NBC later this week. I heard the folks at “Saturday Night Live” already have a skit in the works to spoof the messages from Hillrod, Barack the Rock and the McCainiacs.
Now that should be funny.