Everyone knows that divorce is tough on kids. In a blog I wrote in February I discussed the effects of divorce and single parenting on kids.
Dr. Amato of Pennsylvania State University found children of divorced parents “continued to have lower average levels of cognitive, social, and emotional well-being,” compared to their peers who lived in a stable home with married parents.
One would think, since divorce is common in the United States with about 50% of marriages ending in divorce, that children would have adjusted. Nicki Bradley, a parenting blogger, talks about some of the issues facing divorced families in her blogs, “Rules of the Exchange,”
“The Case for Joint Custody,” and “The Case against Joint Custody.”
Divorce rarely ends amiably and children are caught in the middle. They often feel as if one parent has abandoned them or they are the reason for the divorce. As parents fight over custody and deal with issues relating to their children there is often fighting involved. This does not make the child feel more secure about their situation.
New Zealand realizing the negative impact that divorce has on children decided to do something about it. They are asking that separated parents take a program that is designed to help them resolve their conflicts without impacting their children. The government has recently slotted $6 million to the program.
Parents who are going through a divorce attend two two-hour sessions that help teach them what they can do to help their children through the divorce. Parents are given “parenting plans”. This includes ideas on how to effectively parent with former partners.
All parents who participated in the program thought in worthwhile and 90% thought the program should be mandatory.
It’s a great idea that I hope the United States will adopt. Obviously children of divorced families could really benefit from their parents receiving counseling on how to best help them through the divorce process.
For more information about the program visit “The Children in the Middle” information site.
For more information about single parenting visit the Single parenting blog.