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Putting Things Into Perspective

Today I’m going to look at another aspect of perspective. It is keeping things in perspective in marriage.

At some point our spouse is going to do things that will anger, hurt or in some way annoy us, but we each need to put those things into perspective in the big picture of a marriage. For example if your husband or wife has an affair, that is a major thing in a relationship. You will need to think seriously about whether you can forgive and trust them again, assuming they are sorry and want to stay together. Basically you and your spouse are the only ones who can make that decision whether you are prepared to try and move on in your marriage from this.

However if it is something like leaving the toilet seat up, you may decide it is not worth making a big deal out of it. You might just resign yourself to putting it down and keeping quiet, remembering all the other kind or thoughtful or helpful things he does do. Of course, if you find it really upsets you because you’ve asked him to make sure he puts it down any number of times before, and he still constantly leaves it up then you will need to put it in perspective. Is it really worth making a big issue? How long does it take to put a seat down? If you can ignore it, then fine. If not and it frustrates and angers you, then it’s going to have to be talked about and a solution found.

I’m a person compulsive at turning off power points left on when not in use. So as soon as I’ve finished with the electric jug or appliance, off goes the switch. The problem is several times I’ve seen the switch on and turned off the bread maker instead. This frustrated Mick as the bread mix would be ruined. I knew it annoyed him, so I suggested a solution. I suggested he attach a colored ribbon to the end of the cord of the bread maker. Now if I’m about to turn off a switch and see the spotted ribbon, it stops me. A simple enough solution, but it works. It just needed us to put the situation into perspective and find a solution that worked for both of us.

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