Recently there was a story in the news about three small children being abandoned in a vacant shed where other homeless people were living. The children were all under three years old.
This got me thinking about the really dark side of single parenting. For most of us single parenting is a challenge but it is not impossible. We have the support of friends and family, our ex’s are involved with our children and we are able to financially keep our heads above water, at least most of the time..
This is not the case for all single mothers. Some single mothers are very young, have small children, are separated from their families for a multitude of reasons, may have tolerated abuse from their children’s father and lack the education or resources to support themselves. What can they do?
The hardest part of this is that these young girls don’t realize that there are resources available to them. When parents feel isolated, are under stress and lack the ability to care for their children the incidence of child abuse rises. What choices are available to these parents?
The first is the Department of Child Welfare. No one wants to put their children in foster care but it is better than abandoning them in a shed. In the state of Utah we also have three crisis nurseries where children up to age 11 can stay for up to 72 hours free of charge. This is designed to help prevent abuse by giving parents a safe place to take their children when they are at the end of their rope.
If you know anyone who may be struggling, reach out. These parents often won’t ask for help. Many of them are so young they worry about getting “in trouble” if anyone finds out they can’t take care of their children. They may falsely believe that their children will be taken away and they will be put in jail.
For parents who can’t cope, foster care may be the best solution. This does not have to be permanent, it can be a temporary solution while a parent gets back on their feet.
As single mothers we know how hard parenting is when you have the resources available to you. If we each reach out to a single mother in need we could help prevent so many of the problems for young, single parents.