I’d like to share a story about a girl I know; we’ll call her Sara. When she was in sixth grade her family moved. For reasons she still doesn’t know the boys in the new school ganged up on her. She was teased, called names. She even had rocks thrown at her. No one would be her friend, because the most popular boys hated her. She was devastated. Her self-esteem was destroyed. Over the next few years she went through varying levels of depression. She went from being bubbly, confident, and sometimes bossy, to shy and withdrawn. Her grades went down. She retreated into books, reading 10-15 novels a week. At times she thought of suicide. No one ever asked her if she was depressed, and she never said anything.
Although she had wonderful parents who loved her, they didn’t recognize the signs of depression Sara exhibited.
Signs such as:
· Lower self-esteem
· Withdrawal from friends, activities, and family
· Frequent sadness
· Thoughts or expressions of suicide
· Frequent absences from school or poor performance in school
· Changes in behavior or personality
Other possible signs of depression include:
· Aggressive or angry behavior
· Increased risk taking
· Changes in sleep or appetite
· Changes in dress or appearance
· Frequent complaints of physical illnesses
· Extreme sensitivity to rejection or failure
· Talk of or efforts to run away from home
· Low energy
Instead of turning to drugs and alcohol, or other extreme lifestyles as many depressed teens do; Sara decided to work at being perfect. She got straight A’s. She always did exactly what her parents said. She wasn’t involved in drugs, alcohol, or anything immoral. But she never had a close friend, just a group of friends that she occasionally did things with. She still wasn’t happy. As a senior in high school she remembers thinking, “This isn’t the person I really am.”
Luckily for Sara her story ended happily. She was able to overcome her depression without any outside help, because of her family, her deep religious faith, and her strong personality. When she went to college she worked hard at being friendly and made many friends, a number of them close. She didn’t worry as much about grades and being perfect. She had a great college experience, but she was fortunate. Many teens that suffer from depression never recover. Suicide is the leading cause of death in youth ages 10 to 19 and 15-30% of teens that are depressed commit suicide.
Depression is a real illness. It’s normal for teens to go through periods of sadness and have days when they are more moody. But when someone is depressed or sad for two weeks or more, they may be suffering from major depression. If you suspect that your child might be suffering from depression get help as soon as possible.
For more information about teen depression visit:
http://kidshealth.org/teen/your_mind/mental_health/suicide.html
http://www.aacap.org/publications/factsfam/depressd.htm
http://www.psychologyinfo.com/depression/teens.htm