Recently I was reading an article that questioned how relationship experience affects a person’s success in a relationship. By experience it was discussing how many relationships the person had been in and how serious the relationships were. People who have been in more serious relationships have more experience than those who have been in fewer less serious relationships.
So should you be looking for someone with a lot of relationship experience? Do people with more experience make better mates?
I think that this question is a toss up. There are both advantages and disadvantages to being in a relationship with someone who has relationship experience.
Below I analyze both situations.
Advantages of having a partner with relationship experience:
A person with experience has likely made relationship mistakes before. This person has already worked out some of the niches and has made the needed adjustments in order to make the next relationship work.
A person who has relationship experience understands the time that is typically put into a serious relationship. He or she knows what he or she is getting into and is ready for the commitment. The thoughts of youthful running around with buddies and chasing after the opposite sex may not be an issue.
A person with relationship experience is likely to not be overbearing or as obsessive as those who are in first time relationships and can take things overboard at times.
Disadvantages of having a partner with relationship experience:
There is always the issue of exs. (Especially if the partner had serious pervious relationships) If you are jealous and cannot handle the thoughts of a serious other then experience may be a negative for you.
With relationship experience can also come intimacy experience. In some cases this can be a disadvantage to you. This type of experience can bring on many more worries and questions.
If your partner has had many pervious serious relationships then that may be a red flag for you. A person with a history of failed relationships can be a sign that perhaps it was not always the other person’s fault.