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Relief Society and Fitting In

I have talked to women who feel as though they just don’t fit into Relief Society. One of the effects of Mormon culture is that many women feel the overwhelming urge to be perfect. Many people picture the “perfect” LDS woman as someone who cooks from scratch, has close to eight children, an immaculate house, sews all the clothes for the family, completes a new craft project every week, and still has time to serve others.

The reality is that I’ve never met this woman. If she does exist she should be put in a museum. I think that most of the people I know look at their own inadequacies and compare them to the positive aspects of those around them. Relief Society can be intimidating because it is an easy time to look across the room and see women who have accomplished many important and wonderful things. It is also easy to discredit the things you have accomplished.

Other women feel like that they just don’t have the same interests as everyone else in Relief Society. Some women do not enjoy crafts or baking or sewing or cleaning. It may be difficult to get to know someone if you automatically assume that you have nothing in common. I, personally, am not a crafty person. I can sew, but not a straight seam. I despise cleaning, but I do it anyway. And the only reason I ever bake is because I have an incurable sweet tooth. Once I served on the Enrichment committee in my ward, I realized that even I had a place at Enrichment nights.

In reality Relief Society is a chance for women to gather together and offer support to each other. It is a chance for friendship. It is an opportunity to serve those around you. Your smile or encouraging words may make the difference for just one sister that you speak to at a meeting. Relief Society is strengthened by the diversity of women who attend. You do not need to fit the “Molly Mormon” mold to belong. Your uniqueness can be an inspiration to those around you.