We all have ideas about what makes a good spouse. I’m sure if we compared notes some of them would be the same. Here are mine. You might want to add some others in the comments.
It needs to be someone who you love and who loves you. Love is to my mind a requisite for marriage. I couldn’t imagine getting married for any other reason.
It should be someone who is not only your lover but your friend -your best friend. In other words someone you can talk to and share with and you know they will be accepting of you and value your opinions.
Another pre-requisite is a sense of humor. You don’t need someone who’s a real wit and the life of the party, but a sense of humor is vital. It can smooth over many situations if you can laugh about it together.
Common interests are helpful. Yes, it is fine to each want to do our own thing at times but we should have enough things we like doing together. For example Mick and I like playing tennis, though he hasn’t been able to recently, watching football, live theatre, playing games, music, and reading. Even things like reading can be shared. We don’t often read many of the same books as our reading taste rarely overlaps. But we still talk about what we are reading and issues raised.
This brings us to another one, communication. One of the things people need is someone to listen to them. That’s why talk back radio and even internet chat lines and forums have become so popular, because people need to be able to express their feelings and know someone is listening. How much better of that someone is your spouse? If we can talk things over with our spouse, it can often solve a lot of minor irritations before they turn into major problems. It can also help us deal with major dramas when they come.
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