Here’s a great way to teach your child appropriate behavior; you rehearse it. It’s a really easy technique to follow but it will have your misbehaving child behaving appropriately in no time.
You can read more about it in Ray Levy and Bill O’Hanlon’s book, Try and Make Me! The book is a resource for parents with “defiant” kids but many of the techniques can be adapted for non-defiant kids.
There are four steps to this technique:
(1) Decide on a behavior you want to change. Then tell your child that, based on the way he’s behaving, you think he needs some help learning how to change the target behavior.
(2) Pick a time that is inconvenient for the child and let him know that during that time he will be practicing the behavior until he is able to do it appropriately.
(3) Practice the behavior — repeatedly.
(4) Once your child behaves appropriately, praise him but let him know that if the problem arises again, he will have to practice again.
Here’s an example of how this technique might work for a child who’s job it is to feed the dog but doesn’t. After many attempts to get your child to do his job, explain that you think maybe he needs a little practice feeding the dog. Then pick a time that is inconvenient, like when it’s time to watch his favorite show, or maybe the day of the big game at school. Then make him practice the steps he would need to take to feed the dog. Of course, don’t actually feed the dog but make him get the dish, put some food in it, change the water dish and so on. If he does it appropriately, praise him and then make him undo the steps. The authors recommends that the task be repeated at least five to seven times before you announce the practice session a success.
Once you kids see that they will miss out on time with their friends, or leisure time activities, they should stop their offending behavior.
See also:
Parents Control your Kids’ Behavior in School Or You May Have To Pay A Fine
Stop Doing For Your Kids What They Can Do For Themselves
Is Your Method Of Discipline Working?