In some previous articles, we have discussed how all couples fight. There will be disagreements in every kind of relationship. No matter if the two are family members, a couple, or coworkers, they are sure to have differences that arise on occasion.
The success in a relationship is all about how these differences and arguments are handled.
Many couple or marriage therapists will actually agree that arguments are healthy for a relationship when carried out in the right way. It is when partners bottle things up and do not speak out that tension can grow.
There are some rules that you can place into your couple arguments to help them be more successful and productive to your relationship.
First, remember that the past is the past. Once an argument is over a particular topic is over, it should be put to rest. There is no need in continuing to bring up a sore spot from the past every time that you argue. Therefore, once an issue is settled, it should not come up again. Only discuss the current issue at hand.
Second, leave the naming calling and belittling out. There is no need to get into a cut down battle with your partner. Harmful name calling and back stabbing can only make the two of you feel worse after the argument is settled. Your partner will likely remember the words that you spoke and you will likely regret that you ever said them. Be careful about the words that you use and do not try to get in cheap shots at one another.
Third, try not to undermine your mate. This follows along the same lines of name calling. Never try to make your mate feel like less of a person for the things that are being discussed. Everyone makes mistakes.
With careful word use and thoughtfulness of your mate, arguing does not have to break your relationship.