Do you want to adopt? I think that the possibility crosses the minds of most people at one time or another. For some it is a fleeting thought that is quickly brushed aside, but for others, it is a tiny flame that begins to grow and flourish and soon becomes a passion that is difficult to ignore.
When an individual or a couple decides that they are interested in adoption, there are thousands of questions that pop into their heads. One of the most common is the question of whether this is right for them and if they should adopt. Obviously, not everyone is cut out to be an adoptive parent, so how do you decide if you should do it? The next few blogs will help you process your thoughts and feelings about adoption and hopefully assist you as you begin to make this difficult, but exciting, decision.
As a potential adoptive parent, here are some of the questions you should ask yourself:
Do I want to adopt?
This might seem like an obvious question, but it is still an important one. Do you really want to adopt, or is it just that you feel like you should? Adoption is an important decision and it should not be taken lightly. If you think it’s “a good thing to do” or “the right thing to do”, that is not enough. If that is how you feel, then maybe you should donate to organizations that work with orphans or perhaps you should sponsor a child. It doesn’t mean that you should adopt. Instead, you need to decide do you really want to adopt. Adoption means taking this child into your family and raising them just like you would any other child. Adoptive parenting involves all of the struggles and joys that come with any other kind of parenting. Make sure you are ready for that before you start to adopt.
How do I feel about parenting a child who is not biologically related to me?
It is important that you take a long, hard look at this question. Of course, it is normal to wonder how you will feel about an adopted child, but you should take time to figure out the answer. Can you love a child who you did not give birth to? Can you love a child who does not look like you and who may be different from the others in your family? Some people are able to say yes to this question immediately. That was my experience. I never doubted that I could parent an adopted child. For my husband, though, it took a while to feel comfortable with raising an adopted child. He had to examine his feelings and after spending some time thinking about it, he wholeheartedly agreed that he wanted to adopt. Make sure that you take time to think about this question and give yourself time to come up with an honest answer.