After 28 years of marriage, Mel Gibson and his wife Robyn are getting divorced and it seems everyone has an opinion about it. That comes with the price of being famous, I guess. But the truth is despite rumors and gossip, columnists and opinions of his fans, none of us know what their marriage was really like, any more than you really know want your next door neighbor’s marriage or marriages of friends or family are like. Similarly no-one really knows what your marriage is really like. Or do they?
The reality is that we only see the tip of the iceberg. The picture that people represent to the world at large might be quite different to the reality is like, which is why those in abusive or domestic violence situations sometimes goes undetected for a long time. Would you agree that a marriage might look fine out on the outside but the reality might be very different? Or are there clues that can alert people that all is not well in a marriage?
What might those clues be? What about the husband or wife who always puts their spouse down in public? That would seem to me to be a clue that all is not well in a marriage.
Or the wife or husband who flirts with members of the opposite sex at a party or gathering? Are they just flirtatious by nature and something they can’t change? Or does it signify an underlying problem in the marriage that the person doing the flirting has little regard for their spouse’s feelings?
You might think that a couple that never shows any affection in public might be a candidate for marriage problems. And while I wouldn’t like it personally, I have known couples who never hold hands, or show affection in public and yet they still appear happily married. So maybe that theory doesn’t hold water. Maybe they just feel some things should be kept private or it could be a cultural trait. What do you think? What signs would you suggest could imply a marriage was in trouble?
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