Every state or county seems to run things slightly different. When choosing a child for a family, a committee might meet; this may be referred to as a staffing, or a case worker may choose. Our state of Oregon, like many others, holds a committee. When a child is ready to be adopted, our state will choose three families that have inquired about the specific child. The family’s case worker will represent them in front of 3 committee members.
If you are chosen for committee, often it’s against families that are equally capable of caring for the child. If you hope to be chosen, it’s good for your family to stand out. Here are some things you can do.
- Make a Welcome to the Family book that is age appropriate for the child. Don’t go into too much family history as you don’t want to overwhelm the child. This book will hopefully help the committee see how you will communicate to your child and how you introduce the child’s new family to them. It gives the committee an opportunity too to put a face with a name. Remember, they’ve most likely read your home study prior to the meeting.
- Become an expert in the child’s special needs and tell your case worker how you intend to meet those needs. Know your area specialists, schools, activities etc… A committee member will be glad to hear of a family who is prepared for the child.
- Get involved in a local adoption support group. This is really important because regardless of how supportive your family and friends are, unless they’ve adopted a special needs child, they may not understand the challenges and concerns you may have as a parent. Support groups are great for venting, finding resources, and meeting new friends.
- Have back up plans such as who will watch the kids if you can’t get off of work. Be prepared to be asked what will happen to the child in the event you and/or your spouse dies.
- Showing you can manage on one income before the child is placed, if you intend to be a full time parent, is helpful. Not always, but often times, committees like to see a full time parent (or a parent with a part-time job able to be home when the child is), knowing there will be someone always there to assist the child with their special needs and take them to their various appointments if need be.
My husband and I found going to committee much like going to a job interview where someone else represented us in our absence. We wanted the position very much and needed to stand out as the best family for the child.
Please check out my related blog: While Waiting to Adopt
Melissa is a Families.com Christian Blogger. Read her blogs at: http://members.families.com/mj7/blog