When you are the parent of a toddler, your mind might spend much of its time engaged in gymnastics. It leaps forwards, backwards, then stops briefly to notice something that your child is doing right now only to dart off again in another direction as you think about things you want or need to do or ponder things that you have already done. With all of those mental gymnastics going on, it’s no wonder that you are exhausted by the end of the day. Sometimes, I find myself so mentally exhausted by the time the boys go to bed that I open my mouth to speak and no coherent thought comes out.
Interestingly enough, although this constant mix of past, present, and future thoughts may seem at first glance to be productive, it is actually less productive than if we concentrate on only the present moment. There seems to be a commonly held belief throughout much of society that multitasking is the way to go, the best thing to do. I will be the first to admit that I am not a very good multitasker, but that is not the reason that I suggest that concentrating on the present moment might be a better idea. When you pay attention to the present, you are practicing mindfulness. Mindfulness can help you to be more calm and peaceful, two things that are not always easy to feel amidst the general chaos of life with small children.
Also, even though I am suggesting that it is a good idea to concentrate on the present moment, I do not profess to be an expert at living mindfully. Like any skill, mindfulness can be learned and you get better at it the more you practice. At its most basic level, practicing mindfulness is remembering to pay attention to what is going on right now. Of course your mind will go forward or backwards, and you might notice that you have lost sight the present. When that happens, resist the urge to berate yourself and instead bring your focus back to the present moment as gently and patiently as you would redirect your toddler as he starts heading for trouble.
Photo by vilhelm on morguefile.com.