One of the things that has impressed me in my new branch – not for the positive – was the enormous number of inactive sisters. The Relief Society secretary gave me a list of both active and inactive RS members, and I counted the two groups. We have approximately 25 sisters attending their meetings and participating in activities, and 50 sisters who we almost never see.
As the new second counselor in our Relief Society presidency, I have a stronger responsibility to help these sisters return to their blessings. However, to some extent, every sister has an obligation to help the other women around them grow and increase spiritually. I would like to share a few things that you can do to help the less active return to the arms of their Savior.
- Visit teach. If you are assigned to visit teach a less active sister, particularly one who tries to be hard to get ahold of, the temptation may be to procrastinate visiting. However, these sisters are those who truly need to feel your love. Furthermore, they need to know you are serving them out of love, not out of duty or obligation. Don’t wait until the end of the month to call; call them on the first. Then contact them throughout the rest of the month. Send a card after you have visited (or before, if you are scheduled for later in the month). Remember their birthday. Seek out ways to serve. Yes, it is difficult, but these are the very ones who have wandered away from the flock, and need to be sought after.
- Greet them with joy when you see them. If they put in an appearance at church, greet them with genuine gladness. Welcome them, but in a nonaccusatory way. Don’t say, “Gosh, it’s been forever since we’ve seen you here!” Instead, try, “It’s so good to see you!” with a friendly smile. Similarly, if you see them out and about, at the grocery store or the library, take a minute to say hello.
- Seek out ways to serve. Though you may not see an inactive sister very frequently, you may hear an announcement at church about them or their family status. Perhaps you know someone who is in touch with them. Similarly, when you do speak with them, listen for unspoken messages. In fact, just listen sincerely – that goes a long way. Try to hear what their needs are, and look for ways to help. Sometimes, we are just not able, but we can express that to the sister. “We only have one car, so I can’t offer to babysit while your husband is in the hospital, but what is something else I can do?” Let them know they are in your prayers – and then make sure you are. One of the best methods I have ever seen for finding ways to serve is to ask He who knows the needs of everyone. If you sincerely seek, the Lord will find a way to put you to use.
You may have a large number of inactive sisters in your branch or ward. Obviously, the twenty-five active sisters cannot work diligently with the fifty who do not join us. But if each sister took one other person under her wing, sought ways to help out one sister who could not be with us, prayed for how to help strengthen one more sister and feel and express love to them, then many of those sisters would come back to us with open arms and a growing sense of charity. Then our joy would be as the woman who swept and swept her house in searching of the missing coin; we would call others to celebrate with us as we found that which was lost.
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Relief Society: Building Unity