There was a time when holidays became an exercise in stress rather than a time to enjoy. Don’t get me wrong, I did enjoy getting together with family and friends, but the running between different homes while also hosting part of the holiday in my own home left me exhausted. It was just too much. It was also way too much food, feeling obligated to eat at every stop, and ending up stuffed and miserable. There is a better way.
While our engagements are now fewer in number, we still have to do a bit of juggling. It helps when others are willing to compromise. For example, my brother in law and his wife always invite us to their home, where she usually hosts her family. On occasion, we attend, but more often than not these days, we do our thing at our house and get together with them later.
They may come over for turkey sandwiches and pie a day or two after Thanksgiving and stay to play cards. Sometimes, we go to their house. It’s just easier for everybody and no one ends up feeling left out or having hurt feelings.
While some friends and family have gotten offended over not being together on the actual day, we have tried to help them understand that it is difficult to pack up six people (four kids) along with food and dessert and travel long distances. We also have dogs that we don’t like to leave for long periods of time, so it’s simpler to have Thanksgiving at home than to try to find someone to give up part of the holiday to stop in and check on our pets.
We also have my husband’s schedule to contend with, and we aren’t always sure when he’ll be available. Thankfully, it’s now at the point where most people understand and are willing to compromise so that we can enjoy time with everyone, at a more relaxed pace. What matters is being together, more so than where or when.
Have you found a compromise that works for you?
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