Tag Archives: Family Life

Controversy Over What is a “Healthy” Family

There is a lot of talk about what makes for a “healthy” family and what “healthy” relationships look like. We talk about it here in the single parenting blog too, trying to sort out what a healthy parent-child relationship looks like and what healthy dating might entail for a single parent. One thing I have learned is that it depends on where you read and who you ask and you get very different ideas and opinion about what is “healthy.” What is a “healthy” relationship? And, for that matter, what is a “healthy” family? I think that the evolution of … Continue reading →

Do You Act Differently With and Without Children?

I recently spent ten days away from home, out of the country and away from my three kids. I had never been away from my children for that long. In fact, I’ve never gone more than a couple days without being in contact with each and all of my kids and have worn my role as a mother rather closely and comfortably for nearly two decades. I know that there are other parents who have more practice at being “without” children than I do and I thought it might be interesting to explore whether or not we parents behave and … Continue reading →

The Rhythm of Life Might Have a Different Beat for the Single Parent Family

Family life definitely had a rhythm—there is a cadence and a vernacular that is especially suited to life with children and you just don’t get it without. Not to mention, parenthood brings out a different side to a person—usually one he or she had no idea existed. The single parent family has a different rhythm too—one that is NOT the same as the two-parent family scene… If you’ve experienced family life in a different arrangement—say prior to becoming a single parent, it can take a while to adjust to and discover the new family rhythm. For a while, everything may … Continue reading →

How Many Agendas Are We Juggling Here?

I have got an agenda. I’ve got a work agenda, a personal agenda, and I most definitely have a Mom agenda. That ought to be enough agendas for one household, but throw in three more humans and we’ve got agenda-mania going on around here. I have to remind myself of that fact when I’m wondering why things aren’t running as smoothly as I think they should! I think dueling agendas can be blamed for all sorts of family issues. After all–we want our child to pick up his room and get home on time, but he has other challenges and … Continue reading →

Who Is Supporting Whom?

My kids don’t know it, but I get almost as much support from them as they get from me. I’m not talking about a role reversal where I expect my kids to tend to my emotional needs or look after me or parent themselves–I’m just talking about the fact that having a family to care for and tend to gives me guidance and support in ways I might not otherwise have. Looking after a family has a way of holding me up… My kids have the ability to take me out of my head and away from my worries and … Continue reading →

Sometimes, I Actually Prefer My Kids’ Company

It seems to be a secret—the fact that we parents actually sometimes (often?) prefer our kids’ company and hanging out doing the family thing to other options. I don’t know why, but people often assume that parenting is overwhelmingly hard and that I must be aching to get away from my teenagers (or, when they were younger—preschoolers, pre-teens, etc.) and do something “grown-up.” Sure, sometimes I do like a little adult company, but to be honest, I often prefer just being with my kids and spending time as a family! Now, granted, I am a parent on purpose. And, as … Continue reading →

Even if you don’t operate a home-business, you still have home “busy-ness”.

One of my closest friends called me yesterday and told me she had been reading my blog and that it was helping her focus on issues she hadn’t thought about before. Ironically, my friend doesn’t own or operate a home-business, but she does spend countless hours from home volunteering for a non-profit agency. It was the ultimate complement. I adore this gal. She is organized, upbeat, energetic and motivated. Having her tell me that *I* was helping her, was a bit like having my doctor ask me for medical advice. Needless to say, I was honored. It made me think. … Continue reading →

Sometimes you wanna play up da stereotypes!

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Let’s talk ethnicity here. I’m Italian-Polish American. My wife is Italian-American. All of our parents were born in the United States, so we’re not entirely connected to the “old country.” Our own self-images are formed in part by experience, in part by those representations of Italian-Americans in films and television. The most common stereotype is of course the Mafioso, the well-dressed men with the crooked noses and pinstripes who offered special kinds of insurance plans for small businesses. There are many other popular images, more comical ones like Chico Marx’s playful halfwit, or the jovial overweight “nana.” I also love … Continue reading →

Life, Interrupted

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“Daddy would you put this on?” It’s Sunday morning. I’m sitting at my laptop, reading messages, grading papers, taking notes for a number of ideas: for posts, for poems, for lectures, articles. I have many items on my plate in the coming months. The girls are playing with various toys and dolls, and I like the way that they use their imaginations, rather than relying on the television to do all the imagining for them. My youngest is playing with her big sister’s American Girl doll. It could have been any doll, of course, and I’ll probably write an entire … Continue reading →