The Many Languages of Mother

In my last blog, I mentioned conversations that have been flying around the blogosphere this spring. I suppose it’s not surprising that in May our thoughts turn to mothers. A heated conversation has arisen among the international adoption community over referring to yourself as “mother” in the language of the child’s birth country. Adoption catalogs carry catalogs with jewelry, shirts, tote bags, etc. which have the word Mother, and sometimes Father or Grandmother or Grandfather, in the languages of the various countries which send the most adoptees to the U.S. Since my daughters are Korean, I’ll use the Korean word … Continue reading

Three Mothers

I am my daughter’s third mother. I accept that now. For a long time I didn’t get it. Before I adopted, I thought all the emphasis on birthparent relationships was a bit ridiculous and certain to be confusing for the child. I greatly admired women who choose life for their unborn babies, and make a painful decision so that their children can gain a stable upbringing. Still I thought of them almost more as surrogate mothers. After all, motherhood is not dependent on mere biology (and “mere” is exactly how I thought of it). Motherhood is changing diapers, making tough … Continue reading