Tag Archives: anger

Coping With Short-Tempers

When I started to write this, I was really thinking about KIDS with short tempers and what a challenge it can be on an otherwise peaceful household. But, then I realized that there are plenty of short-tempered parents out there too. In fact, sometimes our kids learn that temper tantrums are a reasonable way of expressing oneself from us parents! I decided to expand the blog to talk about short tempers and temper control all around as a family issue… Having a short-temper does NOT mean that a person has anger management issues. In fact, getting upset is normal and … Continue reading →

“Where Do I Go With All This Anger?”

One of the common things I have heard other single parents comment on is the anger. Whether it is a short, intense phase that we move through in the midst of a separation, divorce, or immediately following and illness or death; or something that lasts for a good while or creeps up periodically to surprise us–wrestling with feelings of anger is a real issue for many single parents. It can be tough not to let our anger affect our parenting. Anger isn’t necessarily a bad thing. I was taught that anger is a good indication that other stuff is going … Continue reading →

Anger Isn’t License for Disrespect

Emotion is a good thing and inevitable. But, when the tempers flare and fly in the family scene, it isn’t a license for disrespect or bad behavior—either from parents or children. Learning how to face emotions, say and do what one needs to, but remain civil and respectful can take some focus—especially if you were not raised in a world where that is how things were done. Sure, we all lose our tempers. Parents aren’t immune to getting frustrated and losing perspective. But, it isn’t an excuse and it does not give us license to say and do disrespectful things … Continue reading →

When a Child Gets Angry or Upset at the Other Parent

We all know that the best thing for our child is if we refrain from badmouthing or saying anything negative about their other parent in front of them. Of course, this doesn’t always mean that we are perfect, but I know that many of us here have talked about how we try to remain neutral and keep our negative talk about the “Ex” for a safe and trusted friend. But, what should we do when our child says negative stuff about the other parent? It can be doubly hard not to join in or feel protective and want to get … Continue reading →

Hostility Can Harm Your Immune System

Researchers from Duke University have found that hostility and depression can harm a man’s immune system and increase the risk of heart disease. Negative emotional states can also increase a man’s risk of diabetes, chronic inflammation, and high blood pressure. Hostile, angry, and depressed people are more likely to have increased levels of C3 — an immune system protein associated with chronic inflammation. Elevated C3 levels have been connected to heart disease, diabetes, and other chronic diseases. The Duke University study tracked more than three hundred male Vietnam veterans over a decade — these study participants were part of a … Continue reading →

Escaping the Trap of the Narcissistic Mother

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In Dealing with a Narcissistic Mother, we looked at how 39-year-old Elinor was still caught up in a desperate game of trying to win the love and approval of her mother, who suffered from Narcissistic Personality Disorder. When Elinor came in for therapy she was sad, slightly depressed and full of rage for a mother who just could not give her the love and approval that Elinor wanted. Although Elinor had a loving husband, and two wonderful children, she was not happy. This is not unusual when basic childhood needs such as love and approval have not been delivered to … Continue reading →

Marriage Fights

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For the first part of this and next week, I would like to explore the top four reasons given for divorce in America today. Why should this matter to those of us sealed in the temple, who have no intent of leaving our spouses? First, because the sad truth is that divorces in temple marriages and LDS families are on the rise. Second, because if most couples in America are fighting over the subject, the odds are good that it is a source of contention in LDS homes, as well. Marriage is a wonderful blessing, but it can be awfully … Continue reading →

Suicide: My Thoughts on One Case

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In Suicide: What Do You Think about It? I talked about the varied reactions of people to the phenomenon of suicide. Today I want to talk about a recent example of a typical reaction to suicide, one that I experienced just prior to Christmas, that season of love, family, and pronounced spikes in the annual rate of suicide. The woman in question who took her own life left no note, so the family had no concrete explanation for why she decided to take her own life. Naturally they were upset. I did not know the woman involved but I knew … Continue reading →

Memories That Linger

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One of our adopted children has just recently been exhibiting behavior that we do not usually expect with him. He has been having outbursts of anger at school and at home. We thought about what might be triggering these feelings and sought counsel from an experienced adoption therapist. As background, eighteen months ago, we decided that the public schools were never going to fit for us. We then home schooled him for a year and a half. It went well academically and important bonding took place, particularly between the boys and my wife. We really valued the home school experience, … Continue reading →

Let go of Your Anger

Yesterday is gone, and tomorrow will never come, right now is the only time you have. How much time have you wasted with your anger? Whether it be at your ex, or your boss, or your family, or friend. You holding onto these negative feelings is only allowing the person who made you angry to continue to hurt you long after the original offense. Let it go. Yes, it’s easier said than done, I know from experience; but it is also better gone than holding on. Holding onto anger, hostility, and annoyance is not healthy for you, or your children. … Continue reading →