Tag Archives: behaviors

When Your Child’s Friend Steals

One of your child’s favorite toys has turned up missing, or that $5 bill you had sitting by the telephone is gone. Suspecting our own child of stealing is one reality many of us have had to face at one time or another, but what if the prime suspect is one of our children’s friends? How do we handle the situation if it turns out that the child’s friend is stealing? If you happen to catch the little guest pocketing something while he or she is in your home, you can try the direct approach and simply ask for the … Continue reading →

Budding Tattoo Artists—Writing on Clothes and Skin

I have been told that not EVERY child goes through a stage where they write on their skin and/or their clothes, but I do not know if I have actually met a child who hasn’t scribbled a little something on their flesh or fabric at one time or another. Depending on your views of such things, the behavior might be a really big deal…or not… I was one of those kids who tried out the ink drawings on my skin (and eventually amassed a bit of a genuine tattoo collection as an adult) and I used to jot messages and … Continue reading →

How Long Does it Take to Make a Habit?

Regardless of whether I want anyone else to know or not, I definitely have some habits I would let go of. Over the years, I have been amazed at how few days/times it can take for a habit to form—either good or bad. As a parent, it is not easy to know if a child’s new behavior is going to “stick” or not—is it just a passing phase? Or is it going to contribute to a habit that lasts a lifetime? How long does it take for something to become a habit and how can we make that work for … Continue reading →

Are You Accidentally Setting a Precedent?

Surely you have heard the saying “If you give them an inch, they’ll take a mile.” I think whoever came up with that chestnut was definitely talking about children! There may be that one day when we are just too tired to say “no” or we give in and let them eat their sandwiches in the living room and suddenly, we’ve got a “situation” on our hands. While we cannot be expected to be robots or machines as parents, there may be those times when we are accidentally setting a precedent. It may sound pessimistic, but over the years I’ve … Continue reading →

What to Do with Night Owls—Part One

Earlier today, I wrote about some suggestions for adjusting to a child who likes to get up early in the morning—just a few ideas for ways to keep the child safe and entertained when he or she insists upon getting up before the rest of the household. Some of those same ideas can work for those night owls too—but often mom and/or dad are still up and trying to have a “grown-up” evening or night while the child is bouncing off the walls too. Entertaining a night owl, or trying to get him or her to settle down for the … Continue reading →

When to Intervene…and When NOT to…

I think one of the most ambiguous and challenging aspects of parenting can be figuring out when to butt in, and when to mind my own business. From the time my children were tiny, knowing when I should step in and help them up, stop an argument, help with homework, tell them what I think they should do, etc. and when I should be a silent supportive has been a tough one for me. When do we parents intervene? And when do we not? Safety is a no brainer. If a child is in danger or is doing something unsafe, … Continue reading →

Why Not Make it a Game?

I know that there is a time and a place for fun and games–after all, isn’t that we try to teach our children? That sometimes it is important to be serious and other times it is okay to play around? But, maybe as parents, we are being far more serious than we really need to be? When it comes to motivating our children, distracting them, and changing behaviors, maybe making things into fun and games can make for a happier and more efficient family? Remember when your child was an infant and you used little games to distract him when … Continue reading →

We Can TRY Not to be Too Dorky

As a rule, I do not try purposefully to embarrass my kids (which is more than I think I can say for them); in general, I try to be solid, reasonable, and not too much of an out-of-touch dork, but I think single parents can get confused and the boundaries can get blurred–we might end up either trying too hard to be our child’s “buddy” or we may get so involved in our own life that we come across as embarrassing and dorky. Of course, as our children become teenagers, they are supposed to find their parents a bit out … Continue reading →

Consistency Doesn’t Always Go Both Ways

As parents, we have heard how important it is for us to be consistent with our children. Setting limits and establishing rules and then sticking to consistent reactions and consequences is what it is all about when it comes to solid parenting. If you are expecting that same consistent behavior from your child, however, you may have a long, long wait… With many children, consistency definitely does NOT go both ways…in fact, if your children are anything like mine—just when you think you have got their behaviors figured out and come up with a reasonable response, they change; just when … Continue reading →

What Makes My Spouse Act That Way?

Do you ever wonder why your spouse acts a certain way? Or where they got a certain quirk? The holidays are a great time to uncover such mysteries. Why? Because while you’re exchanging presents and enjoying dinners together, if you study your in-laws closely enough, you just may learn a thing or two about your spouse’s behavior. Learned Traits vs. Genetically Inherited Ones We all know that we inherit traits from genes, but did you also know you can inherit behaviors too? From watching them. Your mom and dad, your grandparents, even aunts and uncles have opinions, expressions, and mannerisms, … Continue reading →