Tag Archives: limits

When Does the Child-Proofing End?

I am contemplating getting a dog, a puppy actually. I am sure that my motivation is partly influenced by the fact that my kids are all in high school and while they still need me, they definitely need me in different ways now that they are getting older. As a somewhat methodical person when it comes to making major decisions (I am spontaneous enough on the small, day-to-day things, but I like to research and mull things over when it comes to big purchases and decisions—especially as I get older), I have started the “research” and have been reading a … Continue reading →

Just Because it is Easier to Say “Yes” (Doesn’t Mean You Should)

Sometimes, I have been known to just get worn down and give in. It doesn’t happen very often, but with three kids—I can remember times when they all ganged up on me, caught me in an exhausted off moment, and it just seemed easier and saner to say “Yes” than to stand my ground and say “No.” But, I fully realize that just because it was easier to say “Yes” and perfectly understandable, that doesn’t mean I should not have really said “No.” Saying “No” and sticking to our guns with our kids can take courage and determination—more courage and … Continue reading →

Make Sure You Mean What You Say

There are some parenting tips and suggestions that I don’t think can be said to much—one of which has to do with being completely authentic and impeccable with what we say to our kids. We have to mean what we say. I remember many years ago, when I was a young mom of three kids under the age of four and I would devour any books, articles, and television programs on programming I could find. There was one program that I used to watch with the parenting expert T. Berry Brazelton—it was a simple television program and he would sit … Continue reading →

Meeting Needs Doesn’t Mean Giving In to Every Want

We live in a confusing time—with so much commercialism and competition and sheer “stuff”—in can get confusing in a family just exactly what we parents are obligated to provide and what is extra. It doesn’t help that we’re getting pressure and influences from all sides (not just from our kids) and it can be a little challenging to differentiate between what are the basic needs that we must provide for our children and what are those extra “wants.” Some things are really obvious, as in we are not obligated to provide i-pods and vacations to Disneyland. But some can be … Continue reading →

Trying to Keep Video Games in Perspective

These past couple weeks there have been all sorts of reports in the news about whether or not excessive computer and video game playing is considered an addiction. I have to admit that there have definitely been times when I’ve worried that one of my kids IS addicted–whether it is to a computer game, My Space, television, or a video game! I have gotten pretty darn crabby when someone seems to be too focused on any one thing and neglected every thing else. But, I’ve also found that with my kids, what they are “totally into” for a week or … Continue reading →

Do Your Kids Actually KNOW What is Expected?

It seems to be human nature to make a lot of assumptions. We make assumptions about what we think other people should do and understand, and what is motivating the other people in our lives. As parents, we really can’t afford to make assumptions when it comes to our children. You may think that they have been exposed to proper behavior and you have modeled and “trained” your kids as to what sort of behavior is expected when—but, in fact, they may NOT know what is expected. What we think is bad behavior, may just be ignorance or a misunderstanding. … Continue reading →

How Good Are You at Setting Limits?

I remember that one of the “big issues” when my teenagers were younger was talk around “setting limits.” Seemed I couldn’t go to a preschool parent’s meeting, parenting class, or even stand chatting with other parents over coffee at church without the conversation coming around to setting limits. While I don’t hear this phrase as often as I used to, I do still see and hear it tossed about when the conversation turns to things that parents can do right and well. So, I thought we might chat a bit here about limit setting… I do not think of myself … Continue reading →

TV: How Much Is Too Much?

The survey results from the Kaiser Family Foundation were released recently showing a disturbing trend in “screen time” for children. Despite the American Academy of Pediatrics recommendation that all screen time be limited to just 1-2 hours per day, Nielsen data shows that children are spend approximately 3 hours per day watching television and a whopping 6.5 hours per day in front of all combined screens. This hasn’t changed much in the last few years; there seem to be new trends adding to the old. Twenty percent of children, we have learned, have a television in their bedroom before the … Continue reading →