Tag Archives: negative thinking

Your Beliefs and How They Can Make You Unhappy (2)

Ever wondered why some people are happier than others? Most of us tend to put it down to the fact that these happy people have more money, better jobs, better behaved children, no children, close family, etc, etc. Sure, these factors do play a huge part in how happy a person has the potential to be. But they are not the controlling factor. It is what we believe about ourselves and the world we live it that largely determines how happy or otherwise our lives are. We have all heard the stories of the wealthy yet unhappy socialites, so it … Continue reading →

Negative Thoughts Don’t Help

Crisis, difficulty and hardship can bring out some negativity in even the most positive and optimistic of us. As a single parent, it can be easy to slip into patterns of negative thinking simply because we may have had some pretty unpleasant things go down in our lives and, despite the pleasures of parenthood, there are some definite challenges too. It is important to remind ourselves that getting stuck in negative thinking cycles really doesn’t help… So, what do I mean when I say “negative thoughts”? Well things like: “My ex will never pay child support” or “I’ll never be … Continue reading →

Getting Rid of Negative Thinking

No one would argue that being a parent is not a hard job but sometimes we make the job harder by “catastrophizing”. In her book, Even June Cleaver Would Forget the Juicebox author Ann Dunnewold says that catastrophizing is the tuning in to danger and thinking about the worst that could happen. It’s always imagining the worst-case scenario and never looking on the bright side. Parents who catastrophize worry constantly about “what-if’s”. We all worry about the safety of our family but these parents worry all the time and this worry hinders healthy family relationships. I remember when Tyler was … Continue reading →

Do you have problems? Join the club!

Everyone has problems, although when we are going through a dreadful time it is very easy to look at others and wonder why their lives are so good compared to ours. They may seem to roll through life smoothly, while we stumble and lurch from one disaster to another. One of the problems that clients encounter when they come for counseling is that they often hold a belief system that is just plain wrong. Perhaps you hold it, too? Theodore Rubin summed this belief up well in just two sentences: The problem is not that there are problems. The problem … Continue reading →

Bad Thoughts = Bad Health?

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When I was in grammar school, we had a hypnotist give a presentation. It was fun and interesting — especially because I got to be one of the volunteers to go on stage and be hypnotized. I don’t actually remember much of my part in the show… but I do remember what the hypnotist told us to demonstrate the power of the mind. He picked one kid out of the crowd. A classmate of mine named J.R. He asked the boy how he felt. J.R. said he felt fine. But what if someone came up to J.R. and said that … Continue reading →

Good Thoughts = Good Health?

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I was at the supermarket on the Fourth of July because I had run out of dog food. This is a sure crisis in my house. Of course the supermarket was PACKED. I had to park just about as far as possible from the store and still be on their property, and even then I had to squeeze into a too-small spot because it was the only one left. By the time I managed to thread my way through the store, stand on line behind three equally impatient people, and roll my cart back through the parking lot, I was … Continue reading →