Tag Archives: positive reinforcement

Positive Reinforcement and the Power of Distraction

I try very hard to be a positive reinforcement trainer with my dogs, and not a negative reinforcement. Some days it works better than others. When we’re out walking, I’ve got a constant stream of chatter going — encouragement and praise, mostly, though sometimes, I also just talk to them about what they’re doing. If the dogs are doing something right, I tell them. It’s when the dogs are doing something wrong that I sometimes run into trouble. Lally is generally easy to correct. A light tug on the leash or saying her name is enough to get her attention … Continue reading →

Practice Introducing Your Kids Positively

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How many times are we tempted to say something negative about our kids when we introduce them to others? Or, if someone gives them a compliment we say, “Thanks, but…” We have to throw some criticism in there. Why is that? I recently had a friend do this when someone complimented their child on how they played their musical instrument at a recital. My friend said “thanks”, but then proceeded to tell the person who gave the compliment how their child didn’t practice as much as they should have and that it could have been better. How hard is it … Continue reading →

The Voice Your Children Hear for Life

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Have you ever heard your father say, “How could you have done something so stupid?” or “What on earth possessed you to do that?” What is really telling is when the child who hears these questions from their dads is all grown up, and he or she continues to hear these same questions in the that same familiar voice inside of their head. Only this time it’s at work, they just made a mistake, and they are so critical of themselves that they can’t get beyond the mistake in order to find the answer. Maybe they try to hide their … Continue reading →

Do You Need to Hear Compliments?

I tend to subscribe to the “no news is good news” club—I do not necessarily need to hear positive feedback and compliments, but I would rather not hear complaints and negative feedback. In our small home businesses, we may not be getting the compliments that we might be used to in the more traditional work environment, however, and for some of us, we might really miss it! Without a boss or coworkers, our business relationships might be heavy on the business and not nearly as cordial as we might be used to and this can be tough. For others of … Continue reading →

Punishing Your Cat

Let me say right off the bat that I’m a big believer in positive reinforcement. We’d all much rather be praised than punished, right? This holds true for our pets, too. In short, positive reinforcement means praising and/or rewarding your pet immediately after a good behavior. This teaches them to do the good things you want them to do. Your praise or reward encourages them to repeat the behavior. Sometimes, we lash out when we see a negative behavior. This could be anything from a cry of dismay, yelling the cat’s name, or a tap on the nose. We do … Continue reading →

Telling Them What the CAN Do, Instead of What They Can’t

Earlier today I was reading a book and about halfway through, realized that all of the headings started with the word “Don’t”—this caused me to think of parenting and how I have always had much better luck motivated my children when I told them what they COULD do and what was expected of them from a positive standpoint, instead of focusing on saying “No,” “Don’t” and telling them what they COULDN’T do… While I am not one of those parents who believes that children should never hear the word “No”, I do acknowledge that they respond better to positive words … Continue reading →

Using Gifts and Bribes

First of all, I want to admit right up front that I have definitely used “positive reinforcement” with my kids. I am not someone who thinks that we parents should never offer treats in order to encourage our children to behave or improve behavior, but I do think that we need to keep things in perspective. I realize that the using and giving of gifts and bribes in order to get our kids to do what we want them to, or what we think they should is controversial. But, like most things, I think there is a way to apply … Continue reading →

Subliminal Communication 101: How to Manipulate Mates and Influence Lovers

In addition to September’s designation as Pleasure Your Mate Month, it’s also Subliminal Communications Month. “What does that have to do with marriage?” you may be wondering. Manipulation, pure and simple. Ah, but before you go judging and thinking manipulation is a bad thing, wait. Sure, manipulation has been put to many a dark use, but it is not inherently evil. Quite the contrary. Why I Use It Wayne would tell you I’ve almost mastered the fine art of manipulation. I will admit he’s right. I’ve had a good apprenticeship, though. It started in college, as part of my major … Continue reading →

Point Out Behaviors in Other Kids You LIKE

It seems that what we notice when we are out and about it things we don’t like or we don’t approve of. It is easy to take notice of a child who is misbehaving or someone who is rude in line at the grocery store. By pointing these out and giving attention to poor social behaviors, we might be hoping to show our kids how we hope they do NOT behave, but we might have more success by pointing out behaviors that we do approve of and that do seem appropriate… Not only is it just more positive to point … Continue reading →

Parenting the Ephraim’s Child – Deborah Talmadge and Jaime Theler

This nonfiction parenting book takes the “strong-willed child” theory and approaches it from a different direction, one of spirituality. Historically speaking, the tribe of Ephraim was a warrior tribe, firm in their convictions but a little but unruly. The authors of this book have chosen to compare today’s “out of control” child to the Ephraimites, drawing the conclusion that as those warriors of old learned to harness themselves to be righteous spiritual leaders, so can these children learn to magnify their own strengths and to temper their impulses to become truly incredible people. I read this book with a considerable … Continue reading →