Tag Archives: power struggle

Dealing with a Child Who Wants to be in Charge

Now that my children are older, we can joke when someone gets a little bossy and say “You’re not the boss of me!” which is really a throw-back to when they were younger and it seemed that someone was always trying to tell someone else what to do. In reality, most children seem to hit a place when they turn five or six where they want to be in charge—they want to be the ones directing their world and getting everyone else to behave according to their bidding. Of course, children don’t really want to run the household, pay the … Continue reading →

Help Your Child to be More Cooperative

A common cause of tantrums, outbursts, and refusals is a child’s sense that he has lost control. Children desperately want to feel that they have some control over themselves and their environment. Thus, they get into frequent power struggles with mom and dad. For example, if your son starts getting out modeling clay and you say, “No, put that away, we’re about to eat dinner,” you have taken away his power of choice–both how he can choose to spend his time, and what objects he can manipulate in his environment. And when you announce “It’s time for bed,” you have … Continue reading →