Tag Archives: step parents

When Step-Parents Want to Tell You How to Parent

I have learned that for most of us, whatever side of the fence we are standing on, we think that our version is right. I think this is especially true when it comes to divorced and separated families. We live apart and we often live very different lives and how things look from our side seems right while what the “other parent” is doing may seem like it is wrong since it is not the same as us. When you add in the other parent’s new partner or step-parent, you may get even more versions of how a child should … Continue reading →

Dating when You Both Have Kids–Part Three–Yours, Mine, His, Hers, and Theirs

Families of divorced, separated, re-married, and step families can get incredibly complicated. Often, we get so used to how our families operate that we don’t really see how confusing and complicated it can look to outsiders. Meanwhile, for our children, it can take time for them to adjust to changes and figure out the dynamics and intricacies of various family relations. When mom or dad remarries or partners, there are new dynamics to adjust to, if there are more children who come with those new partners, things get even more complicated. When we start dating another single parent, we have … Continue reading →

When Your Kids Complain About a Step-Parent–Part One

There is no denying that divorce can complicate a family. As you probably know by now, I don’t necessarily think this is always a bad thing, sometimes it can add some wonderful new dimensions to a family (not to mention, new extended family members and intended “family”)–but there might not be anything (after the initial break-up, custody and money issues) that is a more slippery slope that adding in a new step parent. I think I should confess to you all that I have never played the role of step-parent but I would actually love the opportunity. Since I’ve been … Continue reading →

The Step-Parent Fairy Tale

I would like to go on record as saying this is all really my opinion–I’m not trying to pick on step-parents or step-families or even movies and books–BUT, I’ve just about had it with movies and stories that depict a benevolent person coming in and “saving” the single parent family. Let me explain… There seems to be this myth perpetuated in our modern pop culture–it’s not the mean and nasty, evil step-parent myth, but the story line goes something like this: poor, struggling single parent and miserable children stumbling along, then handsome/beautiful suitor comes along who is eager to get … Continue reading →

Step-parenthood and the Holidays

You adore your spouse. His or her kids are great too. The ex? Well, maybe not so much. Even if you generally have a civil relationship with your spouse’s ex, things may very well get tense when the holidays roll around. Being a step-parent isn’t always easy. It requires a lot of patience. I commend those who do it well. For those of you who may not feel like it’s going so great, I have a couple tips that might help. Do not Enable Your Spouse If your husband or wife engages in an unhealthy competition in regard to the … Continue reading →

Tips for Dealing with Stepfamily Holiday Stress II

Here are some more tips that I hope will prove helpful: Talk to Your Kids It’s important to make sure that your kids don’t feel like they are taking sides, and that they know you will not be angry with them. Ask them how they would like to spend the holidays, and then work to make that happen. This can be a very tough thing to do, especially if your kids decide they’d like to spend the big day with Mom (or Dad) or their other grandparents and spend time with you and your family before or after. However, if … Continue reading →

Stepparents As ‘De Facto’ Parents: The US Supreme Court Weighs In

The U.S. Supreme Court let stand a ruling this week that outlines a new classification of parent: the ‘de facto’ parent. This classification affects anyone who acts in the role of a parent without a blood connection to the child. The case the Supreme Court let stand was that of a lesbian couple who shared a child and eventually split. The child was carried via artificial insemination by one woman but shared no blood connection to the other. However, both women acted as parents for the full seven years of this child’s life. Did one parent have more rights over … Continue reading →