In a previous blog I wrote about an article I read that detailed quirky rules that work. One of the rules was to tell your kids that you’re basically off mom duty at a certain time. The goal was to assure that mom had an opportunity each day to have some “me” time.
I’ve found an equally effective way to have a few minutes alone (no, not locking myself in the bathroom!) and that’s taking a parenting time-out. Typically, we give our kids time-outs when they are misbehaving but we can also take a time-out for ourselves, to recharge and not feel guilty about it.
Tyler turns seven on November 26 and I feel he’s more than capable of entertaining himself for a few minutes. I want him to know that I am not at his disposal, 24/7. So, if I need a time-out, I take one. He resisted initially but once he saw that I was adamant he does not bug me during my time-out. I don’t take it every day and it’s not for long periods of time. However, sometimes I get tired and want to take a break and not have to talk. I want to sit down in a chair or slump across the bed and close my eyes. So that’s exactly what I do. During this time, he’s not allowed to talk to me unless it’s an emergency.
My time-out generally lasts about 5 or 10 minutes and it’s amazing how recharged you can feel from sitting still with your eyes closed for such a brief period. But it works.
Our kids need to learn early on that they are not an extension of their parents, like an extra appendage. And although I wouldn’t take an hour time-out, I don’t feel like five or 10 minutes here and there will harm my son. Spending time alone with your own thoughts is good for both parent and child.
See also:
Is Structured Play with Your Kids a Good Thing?
Dinner without the Kids and without the Guilt