I have made no secret about the fact that my life is now filled with teenagers and teenagers are not particularly interested in following rules, regulations, or any one else’s expectations. In fact, one of the main jobs of the teenager is to rebel, question, and experiment in order to find his or her own way in the world. BUT, for younger children that is not necessarily the case. There is a wonderful window of time in the early elementary years, when many children are fascinated and consumed by rules and regulations. For parents, this can be a time to take advantage of a natural interest in rules…
Around the ages of 6, 7, and 8 or so—children seem to become very interested in mastering the “rules”—they organize their lives and interact with the world based on very black and white adherence to rules. This is the age where the rules of board games and playground games become important. You may often here children chiding each other to follow the rules and be fair. House rules, classroom rules, and all sorts of laws take on almost epic meaning as developmentally, rules matter.
As parents, we can take advantage of this time by teaching our children about laws and rules NOW, so that they will have a strong foundation when they start to push those boundaries in a few years. Since our kids will be watching us closely, we can model our own appreciation for structure by playing games according to rules, setting reasonable house rules and following through, respecting teacher and school rules, etc. This doesn’t always come naturally for some us and we may not be big rule-followers ourselves—but rest assured, our children will not always be as fascinated by following rules and regulations either. Instead of fighting this natural developmental stage, we can actually respect and work with it.
See Also: Rules or Guidelines?
Attachment Parenting–House Rules