I can’t even count the number of times I’ve heard someone say, either in real life or online, “We’re taking a break.” I completely understand the feeling. In the six years it took us to have our first baby, we stepped off the roller coaster a few times.
This can be a very good thing, and is often necessary. Trying to concieve is not fun, despite the constant refrain of, “At least you get to have fun trying.” Trying to have a baby is one of the most stressful times of life. The emotional rollercoaster between hope and disappointment can feel crushing after several months, or years of unsuccessful attempts.
Taking a break helps in a few ways. The most immediate help is a break from charting your cycle and the constant stress that comes with scheduling doctor visits and taking medications. Use some stress relief techniques such as yoga, meditation or exercise to help reduce your stress level.
Taking a break allows you to focus on your relationship. When marital relations revolve around conception, romance gets pushed to the side. Now that you aren’t trying, invest some time in your relationship, both in the bedroom and out. This builds a stronger foundation for the future, whether or not that includes children.
Taking a break can be helpful for clarifying your goals. When you aren’t trying to concieve, you will discuss trying again at some point, or you may decide you are done trying. If you decide to try again, you may clarify your goals and set limits. Maybe this will be a number of cycles to try or which treatments you will pursue, or whether you would rather build a family through adoption.
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