It is one thing to give our kids plenty of opportunities to make choices and problem-solve on their own, but as they get older we can also help them develop into independent thinkers and build self confidence by talking over with them different options and choices that are and will be available to them.
I find that as my kids get older, they have a genuine interest in the world around them and they need to talk through and explore all the options that might be available out there for them. After all, they often have no idea all the different kinds of jobs there are, or different lifestyles or even all the different ways they might get to where they would like to go. We might expect that they learn these things in school, but there are far more available options than they have probably been exposed to.
I think that this requires us to be open-minded and able to talk about options and choices in a way that does not push our own ideas and choices on them. After all, we do not get to choose for them and even if we “think” we know what would be a great occupation for them, or what direction we would “like” them to go–if we want to be trusted participants and facilitators, our ability to share and talk things over openly and help our children find out about the options out there will be important.
While our children may very well find their own way regardless of whether we help them or not, and certainly regardless of whether we try to steer them in a certain direction or not–but if we can talk through things and share various options and ideas, it may give them a head start in making choices that are right for them.
Also: Choices for Higher Education