Yesterday I decided to take advantage of my son not being home. This was my chance to get in his room and do some deep cleaning. Let’s face it, his way of cleaning and my way of cleaning are definitely not the same.
There was so much dust on his furniture that I actually had to vacuum it before I could apply the spray. By the time it was over with, the cloth towel that I used was black. Gross.
Then there were lots of empty containers, kitchen utensils and two loads worth of dirty clothes. I thought it was a wonder that he could ever actually find anything.
What really struck me as funny was later on when I received an updated newsletter from the military encampment he is at. There is a picture of him and another cadet having their room inspected. The caption reads, “Cadets Romero and W are shown the error of their ways during their standby inspection.”
Yes, I could show him the error of his ways here at home too. However I don’t think the error of his ways in the barracks is anything like what I encountered.
When it comes to teenagers and their bedrooms I have always felt that it’s their domain. I try to leave the cleaning and decorating to them. That is their special and private space. I believe it is an expression of who they are.
Now I know that some parents don’t feel the same way. I have friends whose teenagers’ rooms don’t even look like they are lived in. That is fine, too. It’s just that for me I prefer to let that be their space to do with as they like.
I always believed that my cleaning and organizational skills would eventually catch on to my children. My daughter’s room during her preteen years was an absolutely pigsty. It was so bad at times that you literally could not see her floor. I know that some of you are cringing right now. You would never allow for that.
I guess I just always felt it wasn’t a battle worth having. When she couldn’t find something or when something got broken she could only blame herself. Today her room is much different. She is the most neat and organized of my children. It all eventually turned around and I have to believe the same for my boys.
I wish I could find it but somewhere around my house I have a poem that I wrote when I was a teenager. It was called “My Room” and it talked about how special my room was. It was a place I could safely be in. One of the lines talks about how my room never talks back to me. I just always found it to be a place of quiet and comfort.
It’s the one place our teens can get away to. During these years they really do need a place that they can feel safe, secure and comfortable in. Perhaps parents should let up a little on teenagers and their bedrooms. After all, it doesn’t last forever.
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