Last night one of my all time favorite shows kicked off a new season: The Amazing Race.
This show appeals to me because of the adventure, the sights, and the tasks Racers have to complete, but it also grabs me on another level. The human level. Watching how people, especially the dating and married couples, interact with each other entertains me most.
We’re Not Alone
I remember watching the first season with Wayne and cracking up at a couple trying to follow directions to the next clue box. First they started out just bickering, then it escalated into hollering and screaming at each other as I thought only Wayne and I did.
Wrong!
It only took watching another season or two to realize, guess what?, Wayne and I are not unique in the way we sometimes disagree. There are plenty others out there who have colorful ways of expressing themselves to their partner when they’re upset.
Learning About Yourself From Watching Others
Actually, watching the show has helped make Wayne and I both more conscious of our behavior toward one another.
As I’ve written before, Wayne has a tendency to be an interrogator. (See: Flaws: Sometimes It’s the Imperfections that are the Most Endearing.) And a manager. But other men seem to have similar issues, as I’ll point out to Wayne when we watch AR and see someone else demonstrating such behaviors.
But Wayne likes to point out some things to me too. Like my temper. It’s good to know that when other women snap, they lose it like I do by screaming, carrying on, and ranting and raving. (Usually because their significant other won’t listen to them, is trying to manage them, or is questioning their ability or judgment.)
Okay, that’s not being entirely fair. Sometimes the women, myself included, bring out the faults I listed for Wayne because we have a meltdown of another sort. The crying, helpless, exhausted, I-can’t-do-it-you-have-to-carry-my-weight-too sort. Been there, done that.
Awareness is Step One
We all have these dark sides to ourselves, the sides that come out when provoked by stress and such.
There are many different ways to deal with conflict. Some are better than others, some should never be used. (Like verbal or physical abuse, which amazingly enough has also been captured on episodes of AR.)
But that’s one of the benefits of a reality show like the Amazing Race. Seeing someone else who would react as you would (a) lets you know you’re not alone, and (b) lets you reflect on different ways you could better handle conflict in the future.
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