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The Children’s Picture Books of Margie Palatini

Once again I bring you children’s picture books of madness, mayhem, mirth and merriment! (And I’m going to love every minute of it.)

First is “Moo Who?” Hilda Mae Heifer is quite the cow. She can belt out a “moooooo” with the best of them, and often did, to the annoyance of all the animals on the farm. In fact, her mooing got so annoying, one day someone threw a big ol’ cowpie at her and it knocked her right on the noggin.

Have you ever heard of a cow with amnesia? You’re about to. Hilda Mae could not remember who she was or what noise she was supposed to make. She went around the farm, asking all the other animals and trying out their sounds. Finally she internalized what they were trying to tell her, and let out a big old “MOOOOO.” It felt so good, she decided to keep it up all into the night, and everyone bought earplugs. This book was full of cute little aside comments just for the parents to enjoy. (This book was published in 2004 by Harper Collins and was illustrated very cleverly by Keith Graves.)

In “Stinky, Smelly Feet: A Love Story,” we learn about the power of love, and indeed, how love conquers all. Douglas and Dolores are two ducks who are madly in love with each other. Yet whenever they go out on a date, Dolores passes out because of the odor emanating from Douglas’s feet. He scrubs them, soaks them, puts powder on them – and nothing works. Finally Dolores discovers a whole closet full of stinky shoes and decides the problem is not the feet, but the shoes on the feet. They throw out every last old shoe Douglas has, and live happily ever after. Well, there is a bit of denial involved – the feet still stink. But she doesn’t care anymore. (However, I’m willing to lay odds that after about a year of marriage, she’ll care. Plenty. This book was published in 2004 by Dutton Children’s Books, and illustrated by Ethan Long.)

Last, but not least, we come to “The Web Files.” I love spoofs, and this one is great. Again, our characters are ducks, but these are FBI ducks. (The best kind.) It seems there’s been some fowl play on the farm. A peck of perfect purple pickled peppers had been purloined. (Okay, the book actually says “stolen,” but I was on a roll.) The duck and his partner question all the suspects, including one Boy Blue, Little. In the end it turned out to be the rat. It always is, isn’t it? With more jokes and asides than you can shake a stick at, this is one hysterical book. (Published in 2001 by Hyperion and illustrated by Richard Egielski.)

I, for one, plan to hunt down every book written by this fresh, funny author.

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