Periodically, I will stumble across reports that outline the “actual cost of raising a child”–sometimes online, or in a newspaper or magazine. I have heard some of my childless friends point to the “astronomical” cost of raising a child as one of the main reasons they don’t have any, but I have to admit that how expensive family life could be never entered into my mind when I was deciding to become a parent.
Sure, my life would probably look a lot different if I didn’t have three kids to raise on my own. I don’t know if I’d work more or less, but I might be further along in a more traditional career. I also would definitely have more money to spend on myself. BUT, what purpose would that serve? How many pairs of shoes does one person actually need? Would my bank account be fatter? Would I go on more vacations? Eat out at restaurants more? What productive thing (s) would I do with all that money I wasn’t spending on raising on kids? What could possibly compare?
Maybe it is human nature to look for ways to justify our life style and our decisions, but raising a family feels pretty purposeful to me–my kids actually GIVE me a reason to work hard, volunteer, care about my community, etc. I don’t think there’s any way I could have been deterred by all those reports of how expensive it would be (just as I wasn’t deterred by any of the tales of lack of sleep, privacy, etc.). I would like to see a report that shows the different ways that people actually spend money comparing whether they are raising children or not.
So, I don’t think those reports that say it costs $200,000 or $400,000 or even if it was expected to cost me a million dollars to raise a child from birth to college would have deterred me from choosing family life. How about you? Did you consider the cost? Do you consider the cost of raising children in raising a family?
See Also: What We Can Learn From Our Childless Friends, part ONE and Part TWO