There are a lot of things in life that we can just ignore and it will go away. After all, if you don’t like the weather outside, give it some time – it’s bound to change. But if you don’t like the weather in your marriage or how things are going between the two of you – ignoring it will not make it better. The following items are things you should not ignore – especially when it comes to your marriage.
- Having no time for each other
- Having no respect for each other
- Not sharing responsibilities
- Having no shared or agreed on goals
- Diminished sexual interest in each other
These five things should headline any do not ignore list because it’s important to the health and vitality of your relationship that you do not ignore these situations. When you don’t have time for each other, chances are one or both of you is taking the other for granted. It’s a mistake. You need to be thoughtful. You need to appreciate your spouse. You need to be supportive. You need to reaffirm all of those things regularly.
Respect is a key ingredient in any successful relationship. Respect for each other and for each others views. Respect for thoughts and feelings. Respect for dreams and desires. When you have no respect for each other, you have a difficult time reaffirming affection or taking into consideration their feelings and more.
We’ve talked about the petty resentments and more that can grow and develop over time. When we don’t share the responsibilities – when we abandon one spouse to handling everything without any input or we exclude them deliberately or unconsciously – we are creating the perfect environment for disagreements and more.
When it comes to your goals whether they are personal, career oriented or financial – you both need to be on the same page. You need to be able to talk about these things, you need to be able to work out the financial goals together. If you want to save up enough money to buy a house, but your spouse just wants to live from paycheck to paycheck and enjoy the fruits of your mutual labor – can you see the problem here? I’ve seen couples work at cross-purposes like this on goals for years without ever realizing they had opposing goals. By talking about what is going on financially and what you are both working towards can help to circumvent battles of wills and unintentionally creating friction and more.
As for your sex life, like many other things in life, the sexual side of your marriage will have normal ebbs and flows. It’s important to recognize and respect the individual needs of the couple with regard passion and desire. You can’t turn it on or off like a switch and don’t expect your partner to either – remember to flirt with each other and send suggestive love notes and more. Plan to spend quality alone time with each other, especially after the children are born.
Don’t Ignore These Parts of Your Marriage
Don’t ignore these issues in your marriage and don’t let your marriage suffer because they are being ignored. What other ways can you preserve your marriage?
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