I may not have children, but last night’s episode of “The Baby Borrowers” was one I could definitely relate to: The teens had to care for the elderly.
Since I’m fresh off my duty of caregiving for my mom, the episode struck particularly close to home. Even more so because one of the ladies was on oxygen and two others had suffered strokes. (Except only one, Hedy, was actually being cared for by a teen. The other, Reggie, was the wife of one of the men, George, who had volunteered to stay with a teen couple.) The only thing missing was a good case of dementia.
It was perhaps the most touching 60 minutes of television I’ve viewed in a long while. Both the teens and their elderly charges were apprehensive about spending time with one another. Neither knew what to expect.
Sometimes those are the best arrangements.
“He’s definitely put a lot of things in perspective for us.” ~-Alicea, one of the teens, talking about Les, her elderly charge.-~
Relationships Matter Most
Taking care of yourself, being true to yourself, and appreciating every day were among the themes some of the elderly touched on with some of the teens.
The one theme they all touched on was love. How rare it is to come by, how hard it is to find, and how precious it is to hold on to once you have it.
And one other thing: love may be grand, but it ain’t always easy.
Not Fun All the Time
The experiment has strained and tested the teens and their relationships in ways they never imagined or expected. Understanding how to handle conflicts and fight fairly topped their list of questions for the elderly.
George admitted in his 67 years of marriage to Reggie they’d had a lot of fights and disagreements. Les and Gene, other elderly charges, also admitted to rocky periods. They tried to counsel the teens that it’s going to happen. The trick is understanding that and finding a way to work though your differences.
“The idea is, if you love each other you’ll find a way to work your way through it.” ~-Gene, 77, “The Baby Borrowers”-~
If You Give It a Chance, It Only Gets Better
But another thing the elderly, especially George, tried to convey, was that his love and bond with Reggie have only gotten stronger over time. Every year they’ve simply gotten tighter.
Then Les, a widower, took his teens to meet his wife –at the cemetery where she’s buried. He said how he still feels she’s with him and he still dreams about her at night. And how he’s very much looking forward to being reunited with her in Heaven.
Wayne and I were passing the tissue box back and forth for most of the episode. The teens on the show were doing a fair amount of tear shedding themselves.
I started this year really wanting to understand what makes marriages work. I never expected a show called “The Baby Borrowers” to provide a lot of answers, but it did.
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