…She seems to have a complex pattern of behavior and cognitive abnormalities. These issues become more and more apparent as she grows up. Her behavior is inconsistent with her developmental level. For the past three and a half years, it has been blamed on her background and environment. She was, after all, an abused child who became my adopted daughter at the age of five-years-old. Her background and history was the original explanation for these behaviors and cognitive abnormalities.
Her diagnosis reads like a cup of Alphabet soup! It has been one acronym upon another, stacked up like a brick wall. She is, PTSD, RAD, ADHD, Bipolar, OCD, and several we can’t even remember. Our focus has been the adoption and attachment issues. But, as our children grow older and live with us longer, we see that little brother is different then she is. He has cognitive thinking she still has not developed. His behaviors are far more manageable for us and for himself.
The fact is this is NOT all about adoption anymore. It is not all about a healthy attachment or any of the past abuses or issues our little girl has faced. The problem is now very clear to everyone–including her doctors.
She has all the hallmark behaviors:
- Learning difficulties,
- Deficits in school performance,
- Poor impulse control.
- Problems in Social Perception,
- Deficits in higher level receptive and expressive language,
- Poor Capacity for abstraction or metacognition,
- Specific deficits in mathematical skills,
- Problems with memory,
- Problems paying attention, and
- Problems in judgment.
Children will full Fetal Alcohol Syndrome typically have an IQ of 70 on average and can have an IQ from between 20 and 130. People with Alcohol Related Neurodevelopmental Disorder may have an “average” IQ. But, having an average, IQ does not mean there may not be significant differences in brain function. If alcohol is NOT consumed during the first trimester of pregnancy, there will NOT be full Fetal Alcohol Syndrome. However, drinking at ANY TIME during pregnancy or breast-feeding may affect the development of a child’s brain.
It may be much easier for me to get help for my child. It may because I personally am not responsible for what happened to her before she was born. Unlike other disorders or conditions, with an unknown cause, FAS and ARND immediately implicate parents.
Drinking alcohol caused the problem. The nature of alcoholism and denial that goes with it, often mean biological parents raise children with FAS and ARND.
I am keenly aware of the fact that as I share my experience and knowledge about FAS and ARND it may be with parents who are facing some of the very same problems and issue. Some may know they drank more then they should have while pregnant. If you are dealing with a child who suffers significant behavior or cognitive thinking abnormalities and you did drink while pregnant only you know the truth.
The fact is, that if damage has been done to a child’s brain because of alcohol consumption while pregnant nothing will fix the damage done. Hopefully, reading these Blogs will help parents move past denial and guilt and understand the consequences. If a child continues to have behavior issues and treatment, therapy and other methods don’t seem to help, these behaviors may actually not be the child’s fault. Parents may have to learn to try differently instead of doing the same things with the same unsuccessful results.
There is nothing that will change what has happened. However, there are ways to help people who have had brain damage caused by alcohol consumption while their brains were developing.
Next:The Link Between Brain Differences and Behaviors.
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