While there is plenty of joy, pleasure and delight in parenting—especially as we watch our children stretch and grow and blossom into their own individual people, there is also some struggle and pain. I think one of the most painful thing for many parents is not what happens to us, but the pain and suffering we endure as we watch our children have to struggle and face some of life’s challenges…
I know in my head that I cannot protect my children from everything or make their lives an easy, cushy walk in the park. I even know intellectually that this is not what is best for them anyway, even if I could do that. STILL, can there be anything more painful that sitting by and watching our child deal with rejection, a broken heart, hurt feelings, or any of the other painful realities of life?
Compassion, empathy, and unconditional love and support are the tools we have in our arsenal when our children are suffering. As much as we may want to step in and live the struggle for them—we can’t. BUT, we can be beside, behind and around them to lend support and understanding. This may not make it any less painful for us or take away the lessons and experiences for them, but it will give them the added strength and “cushion” that can make life’s tough realities a little easier to withstand. It might help to remember that they need us to be strong, encouraging and supportive—they do not need us to feel sorry for them. While we are feeling all that pain, we do have to remember that it is ours—they need us to take care of our own emotions so that we can be available to encourage and love them…no matter how rough and rugged things might get.
Also: Teaching Children in a Changing World
Protect Your Special Needs Child from Bullying
and the Special Needs Blog