National Singles Week runs from September 15-21. This year the National Singles Association is hosting events in Atlanta from September 17 thru 23. Unmarried America is also celebrating singles during the same time period, with what they call National Unmarried and Single Americans Week.
“Why the fascination with Singles Week, Courtney? I thought you were happily married? And didn’t you just celebrate an anniversary?”
Yes, I am happily married and, yes, we did just celebrate an anniversary, our 12th in fact. But sometimes I have this fantasy of what it would be like to be footloose and fancy free…
The Fantasy
I’m completely in charge of everything. I have no one else I need to consult about my destiny. I do as I darn well please, when I darn well please. And I have oodles of time on my hands, because I don’t have to run errands, wash laundry, plan meals, or cook dinners for a husband.
I’d own a cute little cottage decorated in country French style. If I didn’t feel like keeping it neat, I wouldn’t. I wouldn’t let a mess overwhelm me, though, either. But if I had a pile of papers here or stacks of books scattered there it wouldn’t bother me.
In my spare time I’d still do much as I do now: take long walks with Murph frequently, read, and play volleyball. But since I’d have more time, I’d also train Murph to be a therapy dog and volunteer at a nursing home.
The Reality
Lately I’ve sort of been able to live my fantasy thanks to our impending move. Wayne comes home every other weekend, but for the rest of the time I’m single.
Now, I realize if I was truly single concerns about dating and stuff might factor in to how I spend my time too. Thankfully that’s not one of my headaches as a single person. I already have enough as it is.
Wayne prefers a tidy house, but it’s not mandatory I keep it spotless when we’re together. Currently I have to keep it clean in the event we have an impromptu showing. This eats up a great deal of my time. As does evacuating the house when showings are scheduled.
Being single means I’m also a single mom to Murph, Kitty, and Tabby. If I’m tired or not feeling well there’s no one else to shrug the end-of-the-night walk off on. Similarly, I can’t sleep in any mornings except the Saturdays and Sundays Wayne’s home.
I’m a ghost among our volleyball friends, who are busy forming fall indoor leagues. I might still be here to play, but I might not. No one wants to count me in only to have me leave the team midway through the season. I’m stuck in no-woman’s land.
Facing Facts
Granted, my single fantasy becoming reality isn’t ideal (heck, it wouldn’t be ideal no matter how it came to be), but single life sucks. At least for me. I know there are many happy single people out there. In fact, recently they’ve outnumbered us marrieds.
I don’t have half the time I thought I would, I’m working to keep the house up more than ever, but most of all I’m lonely and craving the life I used to have. Yep, all those things I fantasized about not having to do are all the things I can’t wait for life to get back to normal so I can do them.
There’s a lot to be said when you find your soul mate. For me, I have and life is much better as a couple than as a single.
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