In Exodus chapter twenty, verse twelve we read:
Honour thy father and thy mother: that thy days may be long upon the land which the Lord thy God giveth thee.
We have all been given parents, not only to bring us into this world, but to raise us according to the light and knowledge they have been given. It is the parents’ job to teach us the Gospel, keep us fed and clothed, and to give us a sense of security in this unsure world. We as children are to be loved and cared for, and when we become parents, we are to pass that on to our own children.
As children and teenagers, we don’t always recognize or respect the sacrifices our parents make for us. We don’t realize that the rules made for us are truly for our own good, that there’s a reason why we’re not allowed to hang out at the mall after dark or to go skateboarding down that particular hill. We think we’re being picked on, that our parents just aren’t cool. We hate having to sit through church and family home evening, and every time Dad gets that “look” on his face, we know we have to sit through another lecture on “the eternal perspective.” How boring.
But as we become adults and then parents ourselves, we can see the reason for all these things. We know why rules were made for us, and now we make them for our own children. I sometimes think that when the scripture says,”that thy days may be long upon the land,” it’s because Mom saved your life by telling you not to swim in the canal! And even though Mom and Dad made some mistakes along the way, we can see that they had our best interests at heart.
We need to show respect to our parents, even when we don’t “get” why they’re acting the way they are. We need to trust that they love us and that they are keeping us safe, either from physical or spiritual harm. They have been down the road we’re on. They’ve gone ahead to warn us of dangers we’ll encounter. They’re like a map, and if we take their inspired advice, we’ll avoid many of the pitfalls they fell into.
Unfortunately, this type of parental love and guidance is not always available to some of us. There are cases of parental neglect and abuse that do occur. If you don’t have a good relationship with your parents, or if they have turned away from their duties and ignored or flat-out abused you, do not feel as though you must follow their example. Take what good they did do and emulate that behavior, but also know that you are free to discard the negative influences they had on your life and do better than they did.
Being a parent is a hard job, but it’s also the most rewarding. Having parents feels restricting, but someday you will recognize what a blessing it was. The Lord gave us families for a reason, and when we strive to live together righteously, they will be our greatest joy.
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