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The Weirdest Thing You’ve Done for Money

goblin

What is the strangest thing that you have ever done to make money? I have a number of candidates, and one of my favorite ones occurred at an event this past week.

It was early November, and I was procrastinating. Deadline loomed: many deadlines, and I wanted to avoid them if at all possible. It was rainy, I was tired, and look! What was that on the library’s web site? A Vogon Poetry Contest. Why of course I would enter it.

For those of you who are not aware, Vogon poetry is the third-worst in the universe. The Vogons were invented by Douglas Adams, the man who wrote The Hitchhiker’s Guide to the Galaxy series. They are greenish-grey, large, slug-like, and they are terrible poets. The contest was for the most disgusting, vomit-worthy poetry in the universe.

So I entered, and on Monday I went to present my poetry at the poetry slam. I overacted, dressed up as a green slug-like creature, and I won. Yep, I won. It was pretty fantastic. Streamers came down from the ceiling. I like streamers.

I also happened to win $100, which we will recklessly spend to go to Cirque du Soleil, something that my daughter and I have wanted to go to for 3 years.

Other weird things that I have done for money include winning a short, short story contest with a story of 79 words. That one, I spent the money on a trip that I was wanting to go on. It was a fairly good rate for word – I think that I won $250. I’ve been a street busker too.

The most consistent weird job I’ve made money with was a job as an –ahem- helper for Santa. Yes, I had a peaked green cap and everything. Since I was a child, I’d wanted to be an elf and boy, did I live the dream.

What weird things have you done to make money?