One of those double edged swords of parenting is watching your children grow. It’s amazing and wonderful to watch them grow, and learn and mature but at the same time it’s a little sad. Every step they take towards maturity is a step away from you, and there is no turning back.
As a single mother I feel this sadness, intensely at times. It has been just the two of us for so long, and now there is a third. My daughter found the man she wants to spend the rest of her life with and they got married.
A wedding is always a bittersweet occasion. It’s so sweet to watch your daugther walk down the aisle to her future but there is a measure of sadness knowing that the time has come to let her go.
There is a part of me that wants to stomp my foot and shout, “What about me?” But this isn’t about me, it’s about her future and the life they will build together.
I’ve never really lived alone, there has always been someone around. Parents, siblings, then a husband and child. Now, it’s just me.
I seem to have forgotten all those things I wanted to do once I had the time. I wander from room to room, but there is nothing to pick up and put away, nothing out of place.
This is a new role for me, single and an empty nester. What will I do with all my time. Who am I now that I’m not who I’ve been for nineteen years? Who will I become?
I’m happy for them, my beautiful daughter and her wonderful hubby. This is just another phase of life, things change, life moves on. All change is a little scary at first, but I’m sure I’ll grow into it.