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Things That Make You Go Hmmm… Behind Bars

You don’t have to live in the Midwest, or have a husband who is a rabid fan of college football to know that this weekend’s big match up between Big 10 rivals Ohio State and Michigan is a HUGE deal. In fact, you don’t even have to be a free man (or woman) to be making plans for the big game. Just ask prisoners at northeastern Ohio’s Columbiana County jail.

According to news reports, the sheriff there is fuming about plans for an inmate pizza party during the Ohio State-Michigan football game.

“A jail is a jail,” Sheriff David Smith told a local newspaper reporter. Turns out, the reporter obtained a copy of a notice from the jail warden to the inmates, which read: “Each inmate will get three slices of pizza in addition to their regular meals on game day, November 18, as a way to show support for the Buckeyes.”

The notice goes on to say in return for their treat, inmates must keep the noise down during the big game and keep their cells tidy. It also said they must stop “horseplay and childish games” and “help us to help you to have an easy time while you’re here.”

When the newspaper reporter showed the sheriff the notice about the party, he said, “There will be no party.”

The only catch–the jail is run privately by a Massachusetts company—so the sheriff may not have a say in crashing the party.

In other news from behind bars…

Some Missouri inmates returning to a jail damaged in a failed breakout attempt got an unexpected surprise. Their “home” has a radically new decor — pink with blue teddy bear accents.

The local sheriff told newspaper reporters that the new color scheme was part of extensive repairs necessary after inmates set a fire and vandalized the interior of the jail last month.

“Basically, if they are going to act like children and commit a childish act, then we’ll make a childish atmosphere,” the sheriff said. “And it’s a calming thing — Teddy bears are soothing. So we made it like a daycare and that’s kind of like what it is, a day care for adults who can’t control their behavior in public.”

The sheriff said the new paint job was inspired by similar redecorating efforts at jails in Texas and Arizona.

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About Michele Cheplic

Michele Cheplic was born and raised in Hilo, Hawaii, but now lives in Wisconsin. Michele graduated from the University of Wisconsin-Madison with a degree in Journalism. She spent the next ten years as a television anchor and reporter at various stations throughout the country (from the CBS affiliate in Honolulu to the NBC affiliate in Green Bay). She has won numerous honors including an Emmy Award and multiple Edward R. Murrow awards honoring outstanding achievements in broadcast journalism. In addition, she has received awards from the Aircraft Owners and Pilots Association for her reports on air travel and the Wisconsin Education Association Council for her stories on education. Michele has since left television to concentrate on being a mom and freelance writer.